[DON'T SULK. His jokes! Disgruntled, he pushes at Nier's hand with one of his, and then uses the other to try to fix his hair.]
Kairi is... [The girl I liked] ...or friend. She moved to the island when we were little, and we played together all the time. I'm starting to think she's the one who keeps Sora and me in line.
[STOP, he isn't an old man! He can get back to the chair himself! Whatever. He accepts the help because he's a recovering No Help Accepter.]
I-- [...] In Castle Oblivion. I was going up from the bottom. Ansem kept trying to get me to give him my body again, so he could use it. But the King found me, and helped me. He protected my heart.
No--wait, yes! Stop that! I didn't liker her like that. Her and Sora... Nevermind!
[He's fucking embarrassed, MOVING ON.]
No, it's... complicated. Everyone is made up of three things: your body, your soul, and your heart. If you lose your heart to darkness, you turn into a Heartless. If you have a strong heart when that happens, your body is... sort of... left behind. As a Nobody. A being without a heart, but with a body and a soul.
This is interesting talk. He never considered a person being divided by three things, but this is how Riku's world works. It gets him thinking, having had enough time to settle on this memory, these thoughts, for days after memshare. ]
[NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. He looks... well, not really happy to be thinking about that.]
...That sounds like a Nobody. They were... There was an organization of them, the one Xemnas was leading. They were trying to collect hearts because they thought they were empty, just... bodies. Bodies with souls. Like a shell of their former selves. They thought Nobodies couldn't feel emotions.
But Roxas and Naminé... [He glances away.] I don't think that was true. DiZ wanted me to get rid of Naminé after we had helped Sora because he didn't think Nobodies should exist.
...I couldn't. Naminé wouldn't have helped me or Sora... if that were true...
[ Nier frowns as he listens to this, though it's... Nice to know there are others like me, even if it isn't the same. It's that small peace that has the edges of his lips quirk upward slightly. ]
To me, it sounds like they had emotions. Naminé sounds kind.
[What the fuck? How is he supposed to even process that?! HELLO?! HE HAS DEPRESSION. No one wants to be a Nobody, but he can't just tell Nier to stop feeling reassured when others are like that?!
Jesus.]
I think there was more to them than what others or even themselves thought. Would you stop smiling about it? You're not... You're not a vessel. You're more than that.
[ Hey. They're similar to him. How can you tell him not to be reassured by knowing he isn't alone? THEY BOTH HAVE DEPRESSION. ]
... Thanks, Riku. I know. People here have told me I'm not empty, too. [ I don't know what they see, but I'm grateful. ] It doesn't matter to me what I am—I'm still Nier. This is my life.
[ And I won't give that to anyone. But I guess Riku just has to sit here, imagining Roxas denying Sora from him. Sometimes you have to pick and choose people, little brother. ]
You're whole, right? Where you are at home. You have your heart, your soul, and your body.
It was... a castle where the Organization studied and altered memories. They made... a clone of me, too, from my data. Riku Replica. They tried to use him to get to Sora.
Naminé was able to alter his memories in the castle, and the memories of some people linked to his heart. She was also giving my replica false memories, too. [yikes] The Organization was holding her captive and forcing her to do it.
She trapped him, and Donald and Goofy, in her pods before I found him, so she could try restoring their memories.
Nier hears that and wonders if he’s the same. If everything that defines him is just pulled from Gestalt Nier, the original. He will just shelf that. Baby brother doesn’t need clone drama. ]
[Well. Baby brother has his own clone drama, for the record. A clone that keeps saying embarrassing things to his super best friend like, "You're always trying to worm your way into my heart!"]
Yeah.
[He can really do to stop sounding so damn bi and fond.]
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Kairi is... [The girl I liked] ...or friend. She moved to the island when we were little, and we played together all the time. I'm starting to think she's the one who keeps Sora and me in line.
The King...
[Saved me when I needed it most.]
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So you used to like Kairi. [ That's sweet. ] How did you meet the King?
[ He helps Riku up, then leads him to sit back on his chair? Like a grandpa. ]
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[STOP, he isn't an old man! He can get back to the chair himself! Whatever. He accepts the help because he's a recovering No Help Accepter.]
I-- [...] In Castle Oblivion. I was going up from the bottom. Ansem kept trying to get me to give him my body again, so he could use it. But the King found me, and helped me. He protected my heart.
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[ You don't need to explain to big brother! It's fine. He gets it.
Nier returns to the couch like before. This time, they can talk as who they really are. ]
... You talk about hearts, nobodies, and stuff like that, but I don't know exactly what that means. Do you die?
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[He's fucking embarrassed, MOVING ON.]
No, it's... complicated. Everyone is made up of three things: your body, your soul, and your heart. If you lose your heart to darkness, you turn into a Heartless. If you have a strong heart when that happens, your body is... sort of... left behind. As a Nobody. A being without a heart, but with a body and a soul.
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This is interesting talk. He never considered a person being divided by three things, but this is how Riku's world works. It gets him thinking, having had enough time to settle on this memory, these thoughts, for days after memshare. ]
... What would I be, Riku? I don't have a soul.
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I... don't know. If you're alive, you have a soul... since your soul is what gives you life. If you don't have one...
[Nah, fam, he doesn't want to say anything about the possibility of Nier being dead even though Nier has already insisted on this.]
I don't know... I've never met anyone without a soul. How do you know you don't have one?
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I don't, but it was what I was told. Told I was just an empty vessel, a body for someone else.
[ Have you ever considered your big brother is kind of like a Nobody. ]
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...That sounds like a Nobody. They were... There was an organization of them, the one Xemnas was leading. They were trying to collect hearts because they thought they were empty, just... bodies. Bodies with souls. Like a shell of their former selves. They thought Nobodies couldn't feel emotions.
But Roxas and Naminé... [He glances away.] I don't think that was true. DiZ wanted me to get rid of Naminé after we had helped Sora because he didn't think Nobodies should exist.
...I couldn't. Naminé wouldn't have helped me or Sora... if that were true...
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To me, it sounds like they had emotions. Naminé sounds kind.
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Jesus.]
I think there was more to them than what others or even themselves thought. Would you stop smiling about it? You're not... You're not a vessel. You're more than that.
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... Thanks, Riku. I know. People here have told me I'm not empty, too. [ I don't know what they see, but I'm grateful. ] It doesn't matter to me what I am—I'm still Nier. This is my life.
[ And I won't give that to anyone. But I guess Riku just has to sit here, imagining Roxas denying Sora from him. Sometimes you have to pick and choose people, little brother. ]
You're whole, right? Where you are at home. You have your heart, your soul, and your body.
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He just very smartly does not comment or even think too hard about the second statement, or he will be very ugly.]
...Yeah. I'm whole. I had Ansem inside my heart, but... DiZ did something, and... I guess he's gone. I haven't felt or heard him.
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That's good. Don't let people take what's yours.
[ We got sidetracked. ]
So Castle Oblivion?
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It was... a castle where the Organization studied and altered memories. They made... a clone of me, too, from my data. Riku Replica. They tried to use him to get to Sora.
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... Oh.
[ They called me and the other "vessels" Replicants. HAHA. Anyway. ]
I don't like the idea of altering memories at all for obvious reasons.
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Me either. Mine haven't been messed with really except for here... but it happened to Sora. And I hate it.
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[ NIER ASSUMING THE WORST ]
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Naminé was able to alter his memories in the castle, and the memories of some people linked to his heart. She was also giving my replica false memories, too. [yikes] The Organization was holding her captive and forcing her to do it.
She trapped him, and Donald and Goofy, in her pods before I found him, so she could try restoring their memories.
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... That's brave of her, considering she's going against the Organization.
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Of course. She was Kairi's Nobody. That's just how Kairi is.
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Nier hears that and wonders if he’s the same. If everything that defines him is just pulled from Gestalt Nier, the original. He will just shelf that. Baby brother doesn’t need clone drama. ]
Brave and full of ambition, huh.
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Yeah.
[He can really do to stop sounding so damn bi and fond.]