[ . . . . she taps her finger on the table in front of her.]
I suppose that is what I struggle to understand about you - all of you. Dimitri is doing the same thing. He hasn't told me explicitly, he surely does not realize he can, but he is so obvious to me.
You take on the responsibility, you decide you will harm others to save them, but you will accept capture and death as soon as you can - even knowing that it will simply volunteer another to take your role.
Is that kindness? Or is that the choice you've made that you can live with?
I'm not sure. I don't think there's a kindness in killing, no matter how it's spun.
For myself... it's combat. On the field, our actions are in the open and largely witnessed. Just as I make no attempt to hide my actions there, I can't imagine obfuscating them here, even if the combat is of a different kind. It's my responsibility to face what comes of it.
But to others, that way of thinking is wasteful, and I can't argue with that, either. My "fair", to them, can just be an excuse.
What would you have done, Iris? If you were approached to join?
But I'm not skilled in combat - so I would settle for either covering for other members of your group, or otherwise trying to keep them alive. Others may disagree, but I believe that once you take on a responsibility, you should not abandon your post. I would weigh my options, and while I know condemning an innocent is difficult, I would make decisions based on my own reasoning of what I could stand to live with based on the mood of those in trial.
In my case, I would protect those that I've decided to protect, and accept the scorn of being considered a villain or a hated person in the long-term for trying to hide the truth.
[she nods along as Iris talks. it's solid reasoning, and clearly well-considered.]
You've thought about this carefully, as expected. It's not how I would—how I did go about it, but it all makes sense to me. It's just different methods.
Our own methods of living with our own choices, as you said.
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no subject
I suppose that is what I struggle to understand about you - all of you. Dimitri is doing the same thing. He hasn't told me explicitly, he surely does not realize he can, but he is so obvious to me.
You take on the responsibility, you decide you will harm others to save them, but you will accept capture and death as soon as you can - even knowing that it will simply volunteer another to take your role.
Is that kindness? Or is that the choice you've made that you can live with?
no subject
she takes a sip of tea, dwelling on the word.]
I'm not sure. I don't think there's a kindness in killing, no matter how it's spun.
For myself... it's combat. On the field, our actions are in the open and largely witnessed. Just as I make no attempt to hide my actions there, I can't imagine obfuscating them here, even if the combat is of a different kind. It's my responsibility to face what comes of it.
But to others, that way of thinking is wasteful, and I can't argue with that, either. My "fair", to them, can just be an excuse.
What would you have done, Iris? If you were approached to join?
no subject
[that's easy.]
But I'm not skilled in combat - so I would settle for either covering for other members of your group, or otherwise trying to keep them alive. Others may disagree, but I believe that once you take on a responsibility, you should not abandon your post. I would weigh my options, and while I know condemning an innocent is difficult, I would make decisions based on my own reasoning of what I could stand to live with based on the mood of those in trial.
In my case, I would protect those that I've decided to protect, and accept the scorn of being considered a villain or a hated person in the long-term for trying to hide the truth.
That is the reasoning I've always had.
no subject
You've thought about this carefully, as expected. It's not how I would—how I did go about it, but it all makes sense to me. It's just different methods.
Our own methods of living with our own choices, as you said.