[ichiro is terribly easy to read, and it is part of what makes iris feel that she can so easily rely on him. yet at the same time, she cannot read something that she's never seen before - that she's never experienced even once in her life.
the miss who loves so much - cannot comprehend the idea of anyone being in love with her.
so her expression just softens in return and she looks sheepish for a moment. it passes quickly, melting into something so adoring, so loving, that it washes over her whole being]
... after my engagement was called off, I was appointed as Fief Lord when I was just 16. Everything I've done since then has been for them - starting a corporation, the late nights, the reforms... it's for my home. I've given them years of my life, and I'd do it again every time.
When I was ostracized by the church this past year - branded a criminal by the heavens - it was seeing my people again that gave me hope, that I could still do good instead of having to be a cruel person to protect myself. One of my last memories from home was my first inspection of the fief in a long time, and everyone welcoming me back with open arms... even though I was so scared they might've been willing to call me contemptible too.
They saved me - even at my most bitter, and terrified, and angry... they saved me.
[because she does not immediately lend herself to being a good person. she is generous and she is charitable, but she is just so easily paranoid and cruel as a result of everything that's happened in her life. it is only due to the grace of the people around her that she leans toward the former, rather than the latter.]
[ oh... this touches his heart, too. it's like he's said, before - their priorities are so similar. home, family (and maybe your family isn't always your blood); those are the things that matter the most to ichiro in the entire world, too. as iris talks, he thinks about ikebukuro division. about the grandma who runs the butcher shop by his house, who always gives him extra cuts of meat because she's so thankful for a job he did however many weeks before. he thinks about the cheers of the division when they headed off to chuuoku. about how they still welcomed them back like heroes, when they won. it makes his heart ache, for a moment, with homesickness, but with a resonating, fierce love for his home, too. he doesn't know iris's fief, but he knows what it feels like to make somewhere feel like belonging.
at my most bitter, terrified, and angry, they saved me.
that softness stays in his expression, but rounds out a little bit, instead, into something just caring. compassionate, empathetic, too. he's so glad she has her fief - even if he's never been there, even if he doesn't know anything about it - he's just really, really glad. having seen iris's memories, and the despair she was in at that low place...
he shifts a little bit, finally tearing his eyes away and looking down into his cocoa, turning his smile down into it, too. ]
...'s how you know a place is home, huh? [ that's family, too. when home has your back when the rest of the world doesn't. that's home. ]
[how immediately she nods at that, before admitting quietly - ] ... Viola didn't have any of that. I think... Viola didn't have many people in her life. If I were to guess.... she's who I would've been if I didn't engage in politics, if I didn't take on the mantle of watching over my fief... but she also didn't have a home.
[viola is so much sweeter than iris. she is soft-hearted, and not prone to fits of fury and paranoia. she is lonely, and she is kind. it makes iris wonder just which of them manages to live a more blessed life.]
At least... not until recently - not until Winter. [iris moves slightly, holding onto her cocoa with her hand, but the other resting her fingertips on the rooftop of their home. their chaotic, organized, warm home with people who are so prone to throwing both their fists and their whole hearts at people.] And for me as well... I think all of you are my heart.
[she looks up at ichiro then, a little embarrassed, but mostly overwhelmingly grateful. she knows that it's such a difficult time here, where everyone's minds are being tampered with and their bodies broken. but they can also find time to take a break and laugh with each other, to rest and recuperate when things feel helpless.]
I know I was resistant to you before but it feels like... maybe I was able to help make a family after all.
[ the concept of viola and iris is complicated, definitely, but it's good to hear iris talk through it. he can definitely recognize the differences, having spent so much time with both versions of the girl next to him, but... at the same time, that sweetness is something that he's seen from iris, too. this one's better, though, because it's her. good, bad, whatever - it's still her.
as she continues to talk, says things like i think all of you are my heart that goofy smile returns, and he can't help it this time, huffing a little laugh. not because it's funny, but just because - well, he's happy. he's really happy to. hear that. ]
Yeah? [ because it is family. because winter has been ichiro's closest comfort, here. he struggled through riku's memories with three of them. he's done stupid things like otome nights and prank wars with them, he's fought with some of them, he's mourned their deaths. they're a family, as tight as tight can be, even in this hellish place.
if she's embarrassed, it's okay - ichiro isn't. he doesn't feel any shame in feeling that kind of big, warm, important love, the kind that effuses out of your body, that you feel in every breath you take.
his smile widens a little further - he's clearly really happy to hear that. ] I'm glad.
You - you definitely helped, Iris. You really brought us all together, you know. [ mm. ] You've sure as hell helped me.
[she sounds a little wondering at that - a little bit in disbelief. because she can easily say all the ways that winter has helped her. all those who have checked on her, who haven't let her hide away by herself when she's the most upset. they reach out to her in a way that's bold and bright, that even her own attendants don't have the forwardness to do, given the way that their hierarchy works.
but winter doesn't care about that - they're so brilliant that she finds nowhere left to hide from their light. she thinks similarly of the expression that ichiro wears now, and how it pulls warmth from her as well.]
Then consider it even - or at least, my attempts to make it even. I really...
[ . . . it's hard to express in a way that doesn't say too much - it's hard for her to find the words, a softer way to say: Some days, it feels like you keep me from falling apart.]
You're irreplaceable to me, Ichiro. And to so many others. Please remember that, no matter what's to come.
[ really funny of read this tag while i'm rolling single digits for injury chances on this cyoa
the warmth in iris's voice is easy to pick up on. even if she doesn't express it the way she wants to, the care is obvious. it's genuine, and it makes ichiro happy, too - though, a line like you're irreplaceable does get him to blush, from his cheeks to his ears, and he has to hide his boyish smile for a second.
he ducks his head, almost a little sheepishly, blatantly and obviously touched... even if "no matter what's to come" does twinge a little bit of worry and anxiety, if thinking about the rest of their time here. but... he's trying to be optimistic, and optimism is something sorely needed. right now, there's no time for unrest - this moment is a gentle one. ]
's really sweet, Iris. I'll do my best.
[ to remember that, anyway. he can't die here - his brothers, his home - they need him to return safe and sound. ikebukuro needs him.
he tilts his head a little to peek at her again after that, though, red and green eyes soft. not quite shying away from the weight of the moment, but maybe just a little unused to being... delicate, in this way. to handling something handed to him so carefully, like it was made of precious glass. he's got trouble getting sappy, but sometimes, there are things that are need to be said. ]
...even though this place sucks, I'm really, really glad I met you.
[said with confidence - she's sure of it. iris is someone who adores excellence in others, often surrounds herself with highly effective people, and she feels like her time her with winter is no different. they are just as much her precious family as anyone else, and her smile is both easy and contented as she places a hand over her heart.]
... someone asked me what the most worthwhile part of this experience was and - I answered that it was getting to meet all of you. I've never gotten to really have such casual relationships before...
[even in her first life - she was a shut-in, a recluse, who ended up having all her relationships fall apart. then as iris, even though she had her precious family, there is a certain hierarchy that most of them adhere to. people normally don't feel like they can speak freely to her, or touch her casually. while an understandable thing....]
... it'll be hard going back, now that I know this. I know that I'm a difficult person at times but...
[ . . . she leans lightly against ichiro's side again, letting her head rest on his shoulder if only briefly. a small little gesture of physical affection, that she hopes does no cross the worrying boundary that they've set.]
... thank you for staying with me.
[ - it's temporary though. she backs off quickly afterward, not unlike a nervous deer.]
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the miss who loves so much - cannot comprehend the idea of anyone being in love with her.
so her expression just softens in return and she looks sheepish for a moment. it passes quickly, melting into something so adoring, so loving, that it washes over her whole being]
... after my engagement was called off, I was appointed as Fief Lord when I was just 16. Everything I've done since then has been for them - starting a corporation, the late nights, the reforms... it's for my home. I've given them years of my life, and I'd do it again every time.
When I was ostracized by the church this past year - branded a criminal by the heavens - it was seeing my people again that gave me hope, that I could still do good instead of having to be a cruel person to protect myself. One of my last memories from home was my first inspection of the fief in a long time, and everyone welcoming me back with open arms... even though I was so scared they might've been willing to call me contemptible too.
They saved me - even at my most bitter, and terrified, and angry... they saved me.
[because she does not immediately lend herself to being a good person. she is generous and she is charitable, but she is just so easily paranoid and cruel as a result of everything that's happened in her life. it is only due to the grace of the people around her that she leans toward the former, rather than the latter.]
no subject
at my most bitter, terrified, and angry, they saved me.
that softness stays in his expression, but rounds out a little bit, instead, into something just caring. compassionate, empathetic, too. he's so glad she has her fief - even if he's never been there, even if he doesn't know anything about it - he's just really, really glad. having seen iris's memories, and the despair she was in at that low place...
he shifts a little bit, finally tearing his eyes away and looking down into his cocoa, turning his smile down into it, too. ]
...'s how you know a place is home, huh? [ that's family, too. when home has your back when the rest of the world doesn't. that's home. ]
no subject
[viola is so much sweeter than iris. she is soft-hearted, and not prone to fits of fury and paranoia. she is lonely, and she is kind. it makes iris wonder just which of them manages to live a more blessed life.]
At least... not until recently - not until Winter. [iris moves slightly, holding onto her cocoa with her hand, but the other resting her fingertips on the rooftop of their home. their chaotic, organized, warm home with people who are so prone to throwing both their fists and their whole hearts at people.] And for me as well... I think all of you are my heart.
[she looks up at ichiro then, a little embarrassed, but mostly overwhelmingly grateful. she knows that it's such a difficult time here, where everyone's minds are being tampered with and their bodies broken. but they can also find time to take a break and laugh with each other, to rest and recuperate when things feel helpless.]
I know I was resistant to you before but it feels like... maybe I was able to help make a family after all.
no subject
as she continues to talk, says things like i think all of you are my heart that goofy smile returns, and he can't help it this time, huffing a little laugh. not because it's funny, but just because - well, he's happy. he's really happy to. hear that. ]
Yeah? [ because it is family. because winter has been ichiro's closest comfort, here. he struggled through riku's memories with three of them. he's done stupid things like otome nights and prank wars with them, he's fought with some of them, he's mourned their deaths. they're a family, as tight as tight can be, even in this hellish place.
if she's embarrassed, it's okay - ichiro isn't. he doesn't feel any shame in feeling that kind of big, warm, important love, the kind that effuses out of your body, that you feel in every breath you take.
his smile widens a little further - he's clearly really happy to hear that. ] I'm glad.
You - you definitely helped, Iris. You really brought us all together, you know. [ mm. ] You've sure as hell helped me.
no subject
[she sounds a little wondering at that - a little bit in disbelief. because she can easily say all the ways that winter has helped her. all those who have checked on her, who haven't let her hide away by herself when she's the most upset. they reach out to her in a way that's bold and bright, that even her own attendants don't have the forwardness to do, given the way that their hierarchy works.
but winter doesn't care about that - they're so brilliant that she finds nowhere left to hide from their light. she thinks similarly of the expression that ichiro wears now, and how it pulls warmth from her as well.]
Then consider it even - or at least, my attempts to make it even. I really...
[ . . . it's hard to express in a way that doesn't say too much - it's hard for her to find the words, a softer way to say: Some days, it feels like you keep me from falling apart.]
You're irreplaceable to me, Ichiro. And to so many others. Please remember that, no matter what's to come.
no subject
the warmth in iris's voice is easy to pick up on. even if she doesn't express it the way she wants to, the care is obvious. it's genuine, and it makes ichiro happy, too - though, a line like you're irreplaceable does get him to blush, from his cheeks to his ears, and he has to hide his boyish smile for a second.
he ducks his head, almost a little sheepishly, blatantly and obviously touched... even if "no matter what's to come" does twinge a little bit of worry and anxiety, if thinking about the rest of their time here. but... he's trying to be optimistic, and optimism is something sorely needed. right now, there's no time for unrest - this moment is a gentle one. ]
's really sweet, Iris. I'll do my best.
[ to remember that, anyway. he can't die here - his brothers, his home - they need him to return safe and sound. ikebukuro needs him.
he tilts his head a little to peek at her again after that, though, red and green eyes soft. not quite shying away from the weight of the moment, but maybe just a little unused to being... delicate, in this way. to handling something handed to him so carefully, like it was made of precious glass. he's got trouble getting sappy, but sometimes, there are things that are need to be said. ]
...even though this place sucks, I'm really, really glad I met you.
[ and this is one of them. ]
no subject
Then your best will be more than enough.
[said with confidence - she's sure of it. iris is someone who adores excellence in others, often surrounds herself with highly effective people, and she feels like her time her with winter is no different. they are just as much her precious family as anyone else, and her smile is both easy and contented as she places a hand over her heart.]
... someone asked me what the most worthwhile part of this experience was and - I answered that it was getting to meet all of you. I've never gotten to really have such casual relationships before...
[even in her first life - she was a shut-in, a recluse, who ended up having all her relationships fall apart. then as iris, even though she had her precious family, there is a certain hierarchy that most of them adhere to. people normally don't feel like they can speak freely to her, or touch her casually. while an understandable thing....]
... it'll be hard going back, now that I know this. I know that I'm a difficult person at times but...
[ . . . she leans lightly against ichiro's side again, letting her head rest on his shoulder if only briefly. a small little gesture of physical affection, that she hopes does no cross the worrying boundary that they've set.]
... thank you for staying with me.
[ - it's temporary though. she backs off quickly afterward, not unlike a nervous deer.]