[ ...unless you've got a magic way for me to call my brothers, i don't think there's anything you can do. which is such a childish, stupid thought, but he has it anyway. ichiro misses home so bad it hurts. winter has been nice, it's been good, but it's not jiro and saburo. nothing is going to be able to close the wounds of this place except for spending time with them. it is the only salve he's ever really known.
he shifts, a little, lifting his shoulder to rub at his face with it.]
[ . . . she pauses at that, worrying her lip for a moment, as if trying to think.]
... we could go completely kleptomaniac about it? [iris,] I mean - if you want to go to the Game Room, and pick out everything you want to bring with you. Whatever you'd like to spoil your brothers with? The consoles, the games, the equipment...
[ . . . she just looks sheepish after suggesting it.]
... I don't know.
I'm tired too - but I'm still lucky, to be surrounded by people I love.
[ he doesn't address the first part, because there's something about what she says that just twists around his heart like a gnarled vine.
... ]
...you know, the first time I went off on one of those field trips, when it fucked up my memories, we saw somebody, on every floor of that little tower. One for each of us, right? They were there, asleep, and then by the time we got to them, they were gone. Beau saw Caleb-san. Kainé saw Nier. Taichi saw his little sister, but - he said he forgot Yamato, too.
[ he looks down, again, back at the water rushing in the moat. ] Mine was Jiro. And when we made it back, I...
.... I was the only person who didn't have someone to come home to.
[ who didn't have a reminder. who only had the strength of his own memory to rely on, to remember jiro's laugh, saburo's smile - and this place took it from him. not once, but twice. it ripped it out of his hands like it meant nothing.
the words manage to knock a little bit out of iris' lungs and - she supposes that's true, isn't it. among that group, to feel as though there are no reminds of home left waiting for you. her expression breaks a little bit for him and - it's not as though she doesn't understand. a series of faces flash in her mind's eye - his homesickness is familiar to her.
There are some parts of family that can never be replaced, even when it grows.
. . . she'll shift then, just so she can sit a little closer to him, placing a hand at his back.]
I'm sorry.
[there's not much that can make this better - she won't pretend there is.
in the end she really can only sit with him through his loneliness, and hope that it will all come to an end soon.]
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he shifts, a little, lifting his shoulder to rub at his face with it.]
I... really fucking have. [ god. ] I'm over it.
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... we could go completely kleptomaniac about it? [iris,] I mean - if you want to go to the Game Room, and pick out everything you want to bring with you. Whatever you'd like to spoil your brothers with? The consoles, the games, the equipment...
[ . . . she just looks sheepish after suggesting it.]
... I don't know.
I'm tired too - but I'm still lucky, to be surrounded by people I love.
no subject
... ]
...you know, the first time I went off on one of those field trips, when it fucked up my memories, we saw somebody, on every floor of that little tower. One for each of us, right? They were there, asleep, and then by the time we got to them, they were gone. Beau saw Caleb-san. Kainé saw Nier. Taichi saw his little sister, but - he said he forgot Yamato, too.
[ he looks down, again, back at the water rushing in the moat. ] Mine was Jiro. And when we made it back, I...
.... I was the only person who didn't have someone to come home to.
[ who didn't have a reminder. who only had the strength of his own memory to rely on, to remember jiro's laugh, saburo's smile - and this place took it from him. not once, but twice. it ripped it out of his hands like it meant nothing.
that's the kind of shit you don't get over.
I just want to see them again.]
no subject
the words manage to knock a little bit out of iris' lungs and - she supposes that's true, isn't it. among that group, to feel as though there are no reminds of home left waiting for you. her expression breaks a little bit for him and - it's not as though she doesn't understand. a series of faces flash in her mind's eye - his homesickness is familiar to her.
There are some parts of family that can never be replaced, even when it grows.
. . . she'll shift then, just so she can sit a little closer to him, placing a hand at his back.]
I'm sorry.
[there's not much that can make this better - she won't pretend there is.
in the end she really can only sit with him through his loneliness, and hope that it will all come to an end soon.]