[ iris's emotions are a little bit like landmines, here, but they're sort of familiar territory. he was fragile like that, once - burnt over and over and over by betrayal, by his father, by the adults in his life. by kuko, out of nowhere, for a cause he still doesn't know. by samatoki, the one that hurt the hardest, that wrenched him down into his soul and made him angry. he's learned to be independent, too. he's learned not to rely on others to do things when he can do them.
but in his core, he's a bleeding heart, and ichiro's a lover and a fighter all at once.
the fighter part makes him determined, too. it makes him steady. he's been a pillar for others in this place the best that he can (at only nineteen - ikebukuro's counting on you, ichiro, winter's counting on you, ichiro - it's a lot of pressure, especially when it feels like he's swimming upstream against it.) his emotions are genuine - soft at the edges, but fierce with that protective compassion that makes him who he is.
if there's anything he's always wanted to be, it's someone to rely on. ]
I - [ a pause. he huffs, a little - and there's a sprinkle of affectionate amusement, amidst all of the negative emotions from the day and the unending resolve that seems to spring forth from him out of nowhere. his voice is soft, and his arms don't move, again. ] ... I'm really stubborn, Iris. [ sometimes to the point of stupidity. she knows this about him by now probably. ] Especially about stuff like that. Can't tell you not to worry, but - I'm gonna stick around no matter what.
[it is slow, and nervous, not unlike coaxing a frightened animal, but bit by bit she'll shift if only so she can wrap her arms around him too. even if she can't find the words right away, she finds herself holding on to the person who is holding her - and listening to his words even if they are hard to truly believe.
her emotions are a hurricane - even amidst everything, there are a few that float above the others. she trusts him. she adores him. she is so grateful for him - just in the same shaky breath, he terrifies her so much when she is still so afraid he may leave, no matter his assurances.
her fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt, as if silently requesting he doesn't. she is rather sure she doesn't deserve this kindness, this certainty to stay by her side, and yet she selfishly clings onto it anyway. she leans into the warmth and - for all he holds onto her, she will try to be brave enough to hold on, too.]
... please don't regret this.
[choosing to stay, or saying that this is enough.]
[ me struggling through greatest regret week like i DONT KNOW? FUCK
anyway. there's that same strength to that statement, too. a quiet sort of warmth, like a flickering hearth instead of a blazing inferno; despite being put into winter, ichiro's always been all fire. for a moment, he takes in those emotions, for as tumultuous as they are, trying to parse through them the best he can - trying to sort out the fear and the everything else, trying to give her the space to navigate through them on her own, too. the trust, the adoration, the gratitude - they make his own emotions flutter in response, the equivalent of his heart squeezing tight in his chest. because he feels the same way - and if she's scared, then, hell, he's gonna do his best to be safe.
he shifts his head back just a little, to look down, but doesn't otherwise move back, letting her settle and hug him, too. ichiro looks tired, even like this - it's been a long day, and his face is a little red, eyes a little puffy - but theres still warmth on his face when he looks down at her, mouth curled into a small smile. it's hard to imagine regretting it even for a second. ]
[ . . . . what a thing to say. she pauses for a longer moment at that, as if searching his feelings for any indicator that he might be lying. the paranoia and trust issues are truly so bad, and the scars have left marks on her heart that are so hard to fight against.
. . .
but she finds nothing. no hint of insincerity, no delusions, no lies. it makes her holds onto him just a little tighter, pressing just a bit closer for a moment instinctively. though she will eventually peek up at him, as close to shy as iris will ever get. maybe it's simpler to say that the emotion is a little closer to just - being awed.]
... I'd be far more lost without you. It's selfish of me but -
It's easier to feel safe when you're near.
[she'd said that once before - as viola. just after she had slipped away as iris again, and he was so upset by the switch but... funny, how some things manage to remain the same.]
[ one thing's for sure - ichiro's not much of a liar. he hates liars, actually - always has, always will - and it's been one of the shitty things about being stuck in a place like this. sometimes he has to lie. to protect people, like kainé, like winter dorm, he has to pretend he doesn't know things he knows, has to look the other way. his emotions are the last thing he could possibly lie about, too, especially on a week like this, because his feelings are huge, the fullhearted, compassionate nature of a bright-burning spark like himself.
that awe might take him out at the knees, a little - unwittingly, his cheeks turn red, and he has to glance away just for a second, because the look on her face is way, way, way too cute, especially saying something like that?
and...
lately, as things have gone on here, ichiro hasn't felt much like the protector he usually does. the limitations on this place have left him struggling, running into brick walls as he watched the people he care about get hurt. watching adora just die like that had been a crushing blow, and with each day he tries to figure things out, it feels like's getting further and further away from any answers. he's been feeling powerless, feeling more like he did when he was a delinquent, trapped and angry and furious.
can he do anything for iris? he's been trying, been trying to do everything he can for everyone - but hearing it, hearing something she's said to him before even when she wasn't quite herself and was all at once, is a pretty powerful phrase. quietly reaffirming, that maybe he hasn't fucked up everything he's tried to help. it's ichiro's turn to look at her with a little awe, this time, but it's more like a lost puppy, as something squirms in his emotions and in his chest that's too warm, too bright. ]
... I'm glad. [ his voice is softer, this time, a little more raw. ] It's - that's all I ever want to do, you know...?
[ make people feel safe. a dream they've talked about, before. ]
[ah... bit by bit, as she calms down from her initial fear and terror, she makes room for his feelings right next to hers. the need to protect others, to make a place where they can feel safe, and take things into your own hands in order to salvage them. it's... familiar. achingly so. it makes her think of the day that she spent on her own, unable to know anything about trial, left only rattling in her own skin trying to think of things she could do after and - finding so close to nothing.
she shifts on the chaise then, moving so she can shift more onto her knees, giving her just a little bit of leverage considering how much bigger than her he is. her arms leave him, if only temporarily so she can loop her arms around his neck instead, pulling him closer as though she is the one holding him this time.
sometimes you are two people who don't know how to ask for what you need - but you try to give each other everything anyway.]
... then know that you make a difference to me. And to so many others. Even if - they're gone for a time, we wouldn't have been able to laugh or smile as much with Catra and Adora without you. Without every attempt you made to make this place into a home.
But even if you seek to help as many people as you can - please know you've already touched my life by being in it.
You don't need to do anything, or be anyone but you, Ichiro.
[and there is something softly frustrated in her feelings - to know that she can't offer him much more than words... but they are nonetheless sincere. they are stubborn, and they are certain - so sure that winter would not be the same if he was not in it. and at this point that even she wouldn't be the same if he was not so stubbornly at her side.
the higher vantage point works for a few things - for letting her be the one to hold him, but also she she can press a brief, sweet, and adoring kiss to his hair, aiming for reassuring and soothing in one action.
all she knows is that she can't allow this place to break him the way that she'd been broken before she even arrived.]
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no subject
but in his core, he's a bleeding heart, and ichiro's a lover and a fighter all at once.
the fighter part makes him determined, too. it makes him steady. he's been a pillar for others in this place the best that he can (at only nineteen - ikebukuro's counting on you, ichiro, winter's counting on you, ichiro - it's a lot of pressure, especially when it feels like he's swimming upstream against it.) his emotions are genuine - soft at the edges, but fierce with that protective compassion that makes him who he is.
if there's anything he's always wanted to be, it's someone to rely on. ]
I - [ a pause. he huffs, a little - and there's a sprinkle of affectionate amusement, amidst all of the negative emotions from the day and the unending resolve that seems to spring forth from him out of nowhere. his voice is soft, and his arms don't move, again. ] ... I'm really stubborn, Iris. [ sometimes to the point of stupidity. she knows this about him by now probably. ] Especially about stuff like that. Can't tell you not to worry, but - I'm gonna stick around no matter what.
[ so yeah. definitely not going anywhere. ]
no subject
her emotions are a hurricane - even amidst everything, there are a few that float above the others. she trusts him. she adores him. she is so grateful for him - just in the same shaky breath, he terrifies her so much when she is still so afraid he may leave, no matter his assurances.
her fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt, as if silently requesting he doesn't. she is rather sure she doesn't deserve this kindness, this certainty to stay by her side, and yet she selfishly clings onto it anyway. she leans into the warmth and - for all he holds onto her, she will try to be brave enough to hold on, too.]
... please don't regret this.
[choosing to stay, or saying that this is enough.]
no subject
[ me struggling through greatest regret week like i DONT KNOW? FUCK
anyway. there's that same strength to that statement, too. a quiet sort of warmth, like a flickering hearth instead of a blazing inferno; despite being put into winter, ichiro's always been all fire. for a moment, he takes in those emotions, for as tumultuous as they are, trying to parse through them the best he can - trying to sort out the fear and the everything else, trying to give her the space to navigate through them on her own, too. the trust, the adoration, the gratitude - they make his own emotions flutter in response, the equivalent of his heart squeezing tight in his chest. because he feels the same way - and if she's scared, then, hell, he's gonna do his best to be safe.
he shifts his head back just a little, to look down, but doesn't otherwise move back, letting her settle and hug him, too. ichiro looks tired, even like this - it's been a long day, and his face is a little red, eyes a little puffy - but theres still warmth on his face when he looks down at her, mouth curled into a small smile. it's hard to imagine regretting it even for a second. ]
I'm really glad I ended up with you.
no subject
. . .
but she finds nothing. no hint of insincerity, no delusions, no lies. it makes her holds onto him just a little tighter, pressing just a bit closer for a moment instinctively. though she will eventually peek up at him, as close to shy as iris will ever get. maybe it's simpler to say that the emotion is a little closer to just - being awed.]
... I'd be far more lost without you. It's selfish of me but -
It's easier to feel safe when you're near.
[she'd said that once before - as viola. just after she had slipped away as iris again, and he was so upset by the switch but... funny, how some things manage to remain the same.]
no subject
that awe might take him out at the knees, a little - unwittingly, his cheeks turn red, and he has to glance away just for a second, because the look on her face is way, way, way too cute, especially saying something like that?
and...
lately, as things have gone on here, ichiro hasn't felt much like the protector he usually does. the limitations on this place have left him struggling, running into brick walls as he watched the people he care about get hurt. watching adora just die like that had been a crushing blow, and with each day he tries to figure things out, it feels like's getting further and further away from any answers. he's been feeling powerless, feeling more like he did when he was a delinquent, trapped and angry and furious.
can he do anything for iris? he's been trying, been trying to do everything he can for everyone - but hearing it, hearing something she's said to him before even when she wasn't quite herself and was all at once, is a pretty powerful phrase. quietly reaffirming, that maybe he hasn't fucked up everything he's tried to help. it's ichiro's turn to look at her with a little awe, this time, but it's more like a lost puppy, as something squirms in his emotions and in his chest that's too warm, too bright. ]
... I'm glad. [ his voice is softer, this time, a little more raw. ] It's - that's all I ever want to do, you know...?
[ make people feel safe. a dream they've talked about, before. ]
no subject
she shifts on the chaise then, moving so she can shift more onto her knees, giving her just a little bit of leverage considering how much bigger than her he is. her arms leave him, if only temporarily so she can loop her arms around his neck instead, pulling him closer as though she is the one holding him this time.
sometimes you are two people who don't know how to ask for what you need - but you try to give each other everything anyway.]
... then know that you make a difference to me. And to so many others. Even if - they're gone for a time, we wouldn't have been able to laugh or smile as much with Catra and Adora without you. Without every attempt you made to make this place into a home.
But even if you seek to help as many people as you can - please know you've already touched my life by being in it.
You don't need to do anything, or be anyone but you, Ichiro.
[and there is something softly frustrated in her feelings - to know that she can't offer him much more than words... but they are nonetheless sincere. they are stubborn, and they are certain - so sure that winter would not be the same if he was not in it. and at this point that even she wouldn't be the same if he was not so stubbornly at her side.
the higher vantage point works for a few things - for letting her be the one to hold him, but also she she can press a brief, sweet, and adoring kiss to his hair, aiming for reassuring and soothing in one action.
all she knows is that she can't allow this place to break him the way that she'd been broken before she even arrived.]