[Yaaaaaaaay. The man looks pleased, and you've saved yourselves from days of him stalking youāwell, anyway.]
Amazing! I didn't even have to tell you about the benefits like pay. Er, that is, you've made the right choice, and I'm glad we'll be working together from now on for the good of the people!
Right this way thenāI'll take you to our headquarters so we can start the orientation immediately!
[Off they go! He leads them through the blocks until they reach a building. Which, to its credit, does look official and everything. They don't get very far inside, though, before a woman stops them. The panda man addresses her as Boss, so apparently she's the leader!]
Those are the newbies? We just got a client and we're short on manpower. Assign them to her.
Aye-aye, Boss!
[The panda man immediately swerves on his heel and starts leading them elsewhere. Wait, what happened to orientation.]
[They're taken to a room, where a teenage girl is sitting on a couch. She looks to be some sort of bird hybrid... maybe a goose? Please do not hold that against her.
The panda man leaves the room and shuts the door behind him. Lux and Lalli are alone with this girl, who looks up.]
Are you two the ones who are going to help me? Please, save my dad!
[That is said to the panda man, not the goose lady.
With the goose lady though, Lalli will let Lux do the talking because he'll probably say something to make her upset. Which means when he interjects in his next tag he's absolutely going to say something stupid. Be ready. But for now, He just watches and lets Lux handle the talking.]
[The girl looks a little more reassured at Lux's word, though still tense.]
The thing is... my mom passed away ten years ago, and my father recently remarried. My step-mom has been amazing. She's kind, a great cook, does all the chores... If anything, she's too good for my dad.
āBut it's all an act.
[She slams her hands down on the coffee table in front of her.]
On the way, they'll find that they have their phones again. The Wiwaldi functions are active, aside from the fact that they can't contact anyone outside. They seem to have a new contact, however: Boss.
There's even a message from her:]
Her step-mom probably wouldn't try anything in front of you, so it sounds like it should be a peaceful case, but let me know if you need help.
[Yay, you can dial a friend if you need it, apparently.
Anyway, their client takes them to her home! And very soon, they'll see her dad insideāhe's another goose hybrid, except... well. In his case, he has the body of a chubby human man with a literal giant goose head.
Immediately, he and the girl begin to argue.]
Who are these strangers? Wait, don't tell me you really went to Ladle!
I had to! You never listen to what I have to say, Dad! I mean, look at how much weight you've put on since she came into our lives!
I-I can't help it, she makes such scrumptious meals, and Iā!
Well, maybe, but the doctor said your liver fat level is through the roof! You'll end up having a heart attack!
[Fretting in the background is a young lady, presumably the step-mother. She's very pretty! And looks like a normal person who is not infected by anything.]
H-Have I done something to offend you...? Please, if there's any way I can make it up to you...
[The client whirls around to face Lux and Lalli, before pointing at her step-mom.]
See! It doesn't make sense that she'd go after a guy like my dad, right? Not to mention, I saw that she looked up a recipe for foie gras! That's my proof!
[Do Lux or Lalli know what that is? Anyway, all three go back to arguing (or, in the step-mom's case, wibbling).
Ganba to Lux and Lalli, whose newfound superhero status is christened with dealing with this family drama. How do they want to handle this? Break up the argument? Flee the scene? Ask for some help?]
[Goose man...like Caiman...Lalli reaches into his pocket for his phone to snap a picture of gooseman to show people later. This is Important I promise. (it is not important.)
After taking a picture without asking, he'll lower the phone and talk:]
I heard there was food. Where's the food?
[Might as well get to the heart of things! He can inspect whatever this stepmother is cooking and see if it's vore or not. Yes, that's how this works.]
[The goose man is startled by the photo, while the step-mom perks up and addresses Lalli. There is a delicious, non-vorey smell coming from the kitchen.]
Oh, are you hungry? I didn't know we'd be having guests over... I really should've made more. What kinds of foods do you like? I can whip something up right now!
[The girl scoffs.]
You should've made more? You already make so much! Fattening my dad up, huh?
Don't talk that way to your step-mother!
[Lux tried to do this the mature way, but unfortunately no one else is on her level. With that said, her client pulls her away to talk in a hushed tone.]
Hey, I've got an idea. If she's fattening him up to eat him, then she'd leave him if he became, like... buff instead, right? All muscle, no fat?
So what we can do is... can one of you, uh, hit on her? Try to seduce her? You just need to make my dad feel insecure, and then I can suggest that he start working out!
[ lux is anti-manipulation? i'm sorry????? also don't bodyshame wtf. ]
There must be another way of resolving this situation. Why do you find it so hard to believe that she simply loves him and wants to take care of him, no matter his body shape?
[There's a lot of food in the kitchen! Plates of rice, bowls of stew, non-goose meat, vegetablesāit's almost like a small feast for three. It seems like dessert is baking in the oven as well.]
Feel free to help yourself, if you're hungry!
[Outside, the client wrings her hands, desperate to convince Lux of her step-mom's evil ways. The dad has gone off to lounge on a couch somewhere.]
Then how do you explain her looking up a recipe for goose liver!?
[The step-mom apparently overheard this, as she yells from the kitchen:]
I-I'm allowed to look up any recipe I want! That doesn't make me a murderer! Why can't you believe I love your father...?
He's only part goose! He's also human, you know! He can eat anything a human can! And I was just curious about how to make it! Call it a culinary desire!
[Actually, while weeping, the step-mom is going to take a bowl of water and just. Splash it onto Lalli.]
You come into my house and accuse me of being a killer...!
[Meanwhile, watching this, the client whispers to Lux:]
... Still sure you don't want to go with the seduction plan...?
[ in fact, lux is storming over there to slap the step-mom! you splash lalli? you splash lalli with water? jail for step mother! jail for a thousand years! ]
Your step daughter is worried about a man you claim to love, and you seem to have no interest in repairing this relationship! You don't get to love only some parts of his life.
I would be willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, but you show no interest in explaining your own very alarming actions!
[He's splashed! And after a couple moments of flailing from water, he's hissing like a cat at the stepmom. Probably not the best choice in a world with animal-people but whatever.
Lux is slapping her though, which is nice. 100 points to Fall dorm!]
[ this is why lux said don't body shame! this is why she wanted them to just talk! ladies can like bigger men!! god. anyway, despite the foie gras thing really not being addressed or resolved, lux will still count this as a job well done. ]
Alright. Thanks for your business. Please try to communicate properly next time, before involving other people in your affairs.
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[He casts one more look of suspicion at the strange man before finally nodding.]
Okay.
[It sounds like Lux is going to do it regardless, and he's not going to let her do it alone.]
[1/2]
Amazing! I didn't even have to tell you about the benefits like pay. Er, that is, you've made the right choice, and I'm glad we'll be working together from now on for the good of the people!
Right this way thenāI'll take you to our headquarters so we can start the orientation immediately!
[Off they go! He leads them through the blocks until they reach a building. Which, to its credit, does look official and everything. They don't get very far inside, though, before a woman stops them. The panda man addresses her as Boss, so apparently she's the leader!]
Those are the newbies? We just got a client and we're short on manpower. Assign them to her.
Aye-aye, Boss!
[The panda man immediately swerves on his heel and starts leading them elsewhere. Wait, what happened to orientation.]
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The panda man leaves the room and shuts the door behind him. Lux and Lalli are alone with this girl, who looks up.]
Are you two the ones who are going to help me? Please, save my dad!
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Yes, absolutely. Can you tell us the situation?
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[That is said to the panda man, not the goose lady.
With the goose lady though, Lalli will let Lux do the talking because he'll probably say something to make her upset. Which means when he interjects in his next tag he's absolutely going to say something stupid. Be ready. But for now, He just watches and lets Lux handle the talking.]
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The thing is... my mom passed away ten years ago, and my father recently remarried. My step-mom has been amazing. She's kind, a great cook, does all the chores... If anything, she's too good for my dad.
āBut it's all an act.
[She slams her hands down on the coffee table in front of her.]
I think she's planning on eating my dad!
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Oh. Okay.
Um... What evidence do you have for this?
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Mmm, alright. Trying to eat people is usually a sign of infection anyway. We'll take her out. What does she look like?
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āWait, what? You can't just kill her! What kind of superhero are you!?
[Nooooooooo murder! Still, she stands up.]
I'll take you to my place so you can see for yourself. [She pauses.] But really, you can't kill her! That's too drastic!
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He means take her out like... Take care of the problem. In a way that is nonviolent.
[ although lux isn't sure how they're going to do that? maybe they can break up this couple? SHOULD they even be doing that? oh well. ]
... Please, show us the way.
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It would have to be nonviolent, I don't have my gun.
[But yeah he'll follow them. Off to be a homewrecker!]
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On the way, they'll find that they have their phones again. The Wiwaldi functions are active, aside from the fact that they can't contact anyone outside. They seem to have a new contact, however: Boss.
There's even a message from her:]
Her step-mom probably wouldn't try anything in front of you, so it sounds like it should be a peaceful case, but let me know if you need help.
[Yay, you can dial a friend if you need it, apparently.
Anyway, their client takes them to her home! And very soon, they'll see her dad insideāhe's another goose hybrid, except... well. In his case, he has the body of a chubby human man with a literal giant goose head.
Immediately, he and the girl begin to argue.]
Who are these strangers? Wait, don't tell me you really went to Ladle!
I had to! You never listen to what I have to say, Dad! I mean, look at how much weight you've put on since she came into our lives!
I-I can't help it, she makes such scrumptious meals, and Iā!
Well, maybe, but the doctor said your liver fat level is through the roof! You'll end up having a heart attack!
[Fretting in the background is a young lady, presumably the step-mother. She's very pretty! And looks like a normal person who is not infected by anything.]
H-Have I done something to offend you...? Please, if there's any way I can make it up to you...
[The client whirls around to face Lux and Lalli, before pointing at her step-mom.]
See! It doesn't make sense that she'd go after a guy like my dad, right? Not to mention, I saw that she looked up a recipe for foie gras! That's my proof!
[Do Lux or Lalli know what that is? Anyway, all three go back to arguing (or, in the step-mom's case, wibbling).
Ganba to Lux and Lalli, whose newfound superhero status is christened with dealing with this family drama. How do they want to handle this? Break up the argument? Flee the scene? Ask for some help?]
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anyway, lux steps into the fray, trying to get herself in the middle of everyone, then clears her throat very loudly. ]
Ahem. Everyone! Why don't we all have a nice, mediated conversation and get ourselves sorted out?
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After taking a picture without asking, he'll lower the phone and talk:]
I heard there was food. Where's the food?
[Might as well get to the heart of things! He can inspect whatever this stepmother is cooking and see if it's vore or not. Yes, that's how this works.]
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Oh, are you hungry? I didn't know we'd be having guests over... I really should've made more. What kinds of foods do you like? I can whip something up right now!
[The girl scoffs.]
You should've made more? You already make so much! Fattening my dad up, huh?
Don't talk that way to your step-mother!
[Lux tried to do this the mature way, but unfortunately no one else is on her level. With that said, her client pulls her away to talk in a hushed tone.]
Hey, I've got an idea. If she's fattening him up to eat him, then she'd leave him if he became, like... buff instead, right? All muscle, no fat?
So what we can do is... can one of you, uh, hit on her? Try to seduce her? You just need to make my dad feel insecure, and then I can suggest that he start working out!
[#genius]
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[ lux is anti-manipulation? i'm sorry????? also don't bodyshame wtf. ]
There must be another way of resolving this situation. Why do you find it so hard to believe that she simply loves him and wants to take care of him, no matter his body shape?
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What's cooking in there? Lalli is absolutely poking his nose everywhere to see what's being made.]
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Feel free to help yourself, if you're hungry!
[Outside, the client wrings her hands, desperate to convince Lux of her step-mom's evil ways. The dad has gone off to lounge on a couch somewhere.]
Then how do you explain her looking up a recipe for goose liver!?
[The step-mom apparently overheard this, as she yells from the kitchen:]
I-I'm allowed to look up any recipe I want! That doesn't make me a murderer! Why can't you believe I love your father...?
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[ lux doesn't like having to shout to talk to these people in different rooms, GOD. ]
Why would you look up a recipe you have no intention of making? You must understand why this unnerves your step daughter!
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[He points to the rice and stew.]
Geese eat grass and bugs and stuff like that. They can't digest this food. It's a wonder his stomach hasn't exploded yet.
[Lalli how do you know that happens?]
If you're going to be married to a goose, at least learn how to cook foods he can eat. You're being irresponsible.
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[Actually, while weeping, the step-mom is going to take a bowl of water and just. Splash it onto Lalli.]
You come into my house and accuse me of being a killer...!
[Meanwhile, watching this, the client whispers to Lux:]
... Still sure you don't want to go with the seduction plan...?
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She's not my type.
[ in fact, lux is storming over there to slap the step-mom! you splash lalli? you splash lalli with water? jail for step mother! jail for a thousand years! ]
Your step daughter is worried about a man you claim to love, and you seem to have no interest in repairing this relationship! You don't get to love only some parts of his life.
I would be willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, but you show no interest in explaining your own very alarming actions!
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Lux is slapping her though, which is nice. 100 points to Fall dorm!]
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IāI just like fat men, all right!?
[The client pauses, before handing Lalli a towel.]
What?
[The father looks up from the couch.]
... What?
[After another pause, the client looks at Lux and Lalli.]
... Actually, I think we'll sort this out ourselves. Thanks, uh, for your work? You can go back now. I'll send over payment later.
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[ this is why lux said don't body shame! this is why she wanted them to just talk! ladies can like bigger men!! god. anyway, despite the foie gras thing really not being addressed or resolved, lux will still count this as a job well done. ]
Alright. Thanks for your business. Please try to communicate properly next time, before involving other people in your affairs.
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