[ AUDIENCE: BRADLEY BAIN ]

[dormheads]

Comments

[battling]

You holding up okay? Considerin' everything that happened? How's the rest of the dorm?

[ Trampled to death by a horse is a horrible way to die. ]

What did the bear say?

[darksubverted]

We're... managing. Everyone took it pretty hard. But I think being together will get us through it.

He said he lost his keys.

[battling]

Rely on each other, right? That hasn't changed. Can ya tell 'em I'm fine or is somethin' gonna stop ya?

He managed to find one. That's how we got the phone. Kinda surprised it works at all when it's like this. Whatever, better we can talk.

[darksubverted]

I can try, but there might be rules I have to follow. So I don't know if I can.

I'll take this over nothing, yeah.

[battling]

Figures. Long as ya try I ain't gonna be mad. It'd be relievin' for 'em to know we ain't gone forever, y'know?

[There's a pause, an uncomfortable noise and then slowly, reluctantly...]

D'ya remember what I said about that... weird field trip we were on... With the house?

[darksubverted]

Right.

[Oh. Hm,,]

The one where you all disappeared? Yeah, I remember.

[battling]

It... was worse than I made it out. Don't tell Miss Ghost I told ya, okay?

[He hates this place and all its compulsions.]

[darksubverted]

[Oh............ damb. He's quiet on the other end for a long moment or two.]

Are you okay?

[battling]

I'm- [ "fine" isn't true. ] If I say I'm not it feels like letting that place win.

[darksubverted]

...

[He's not very good at this sort of stuff. He thinks so anyway. So it takes him a minute. The silence isn't awkward as much as it is sympathetic.]

It's hard to say things aren't fine. I know. But you'd be surprised by how many other people aren't fine either. Like me.

I don't think you're letting it win.

[battling]

[Gently.]

... It's okay to not be okay, Luke. Talk to people.

[There's silence on the line, trying to figure out just how much he wants to say.

A sigh, and then he begins speaking again.]

We were made to believe we were a family of serial killers. We killed Nier and Lila there. Probably more people we were plannin' on. Just... fully under that place's control. Like it was the only life we'd ever known.

It still feels real, even now. Everythin' we did.

I hated it. I still hate it. I should be the only person in control of my thoughts 'nd actions.

[darksubverted]

I know. I'm trying to be better about it.

[Talking to people. And admitting he isn't okay.]

I agree. I'd hate to not be in control of myself. [This is very funny.] I don't... know where you went, or why. But I'm sorry you had to go through it.

And that... I didn't know it was as bad as it was sooner.

[battling]

Hard ain't it? T' change?

[luke. (riku). buddy.]

How were ya supposed to know? We were withholdin' information. You had enough t' worry about.

[He's fairly certain he didn't want to talk about this either.]

[darksubverted]

Yeah.

[listen,]

I know. I... should have been more persistent. Or... I should have just assumed it was worse than any of you would say after how you all came out. I was stupid.

[battling]

Don't call yerself stupid for that. There's a lot of shit t' worry about all of the time 'round here.

I didn't want to add to it.

[wow this forced emotion sharing thing sucks!]

[darksubverted]

I know, but you guys are a part of my dorm. I'm responsible. That's... why I asked to be a Dorm Head. I could have done a little more.

[There's a sigh.]

It's okay.

[battling]

[A chuckle.]

Am I still part of Fall if I got "expelled"?

[He is sensing an out and he is going to take it.]

[darksubverted]

[There's the noise of him lightly sucking his teeth.]

Shut up.

[It sounds wry.]

Of course. I'd be a hypocrite if I threw you out after what happened to me last year.

[battling]

[ a warm laugh ]

Glad to stay.

What happened?

[darksubverted]

[He's quiet for a long moment. He's thinking about getting into an argument with Hope over the varying levels of what event is worse than another.

His voice is lower when he speaks.]

Last year, I... was taking a class that turned out to be harder than I thought. I was failing, so... I decided to cheat to try to pass it. But I got caught, and I failed it anyway.

[battling]

[He doesn't understand this concept but, he does understand that it's something Luke is not proud of. Bradley is not one for regrets or to dwell on the past. What use is there in stewing with regret?

There are things that can change with magic, but the past? Nobody can fix that.]

When ya fuck up the only thing you can do is own it and try to be better. How d'ya think that's goin', kiddo?

[darksubverted]

[Not dwelling on regrets? How'd you get into Fall Dorm, Bradley. We're revoking that card.]

...slower than I'd like. But I guess you have to start somewhere.

[battling]

[ Sometimes you make the executive decision to put all your regrets in a box, shove that box to the very back of your mind and then go on with your life.

He might be 600+ but why would he waste his time that way? There are better things to put his thoughts towards. ]

Slow ain't bad. Means it's happening at all. Some people don't change despite everythin' happening around them. What's that sayin'? The start is the hardest.

[darksubverted]

[Bradley is Batman confirmed.]

...

[He's quiet on his end of the line, but it isn't a bad quiet at all. It sounds like maybe there's a bit of a tiny, tiny smile in his voice.]

Yeah, that's true.

[battling]

[ He does like bats.

What a good kid. ]

Exactly. Just keep workin' on what ya wanna change. You'll get there.

Glad we still get t' talk.

[ Even if! He didn't want to talk about some of that willingly! ]