I do. It took me a long time... to realize that. It took me a long time to figure out how to not ruin that. I haven't even started yet. To... be the friend that they deserve, the one they've been to me all this time.
...I think Molly and Caleb just understand more than you think. I know I asked you once whether your past and who you were really mattered. It was before... Well, Roxas was like that, too. He couldn't figure out where he came from, who he was. We put him in a digital town to keep him until he could finally rejoin with Sora instead of trying to tell him. It... wasn't exactly the right thing to do. He was angry.
I can't blame him. So I don't think it's bad you wanted to know. Knowing... lets you look ahead, right? Instead of always having to look at the past.
You really live a way wilder life in reality, huh? [ Instead of just going to the same school for a million years. There's so much frustrated confusion in him, trying to really figure it out. 'Who am I? What am I?' ]
I really appreciate the thought, I just... Well, I think Molly understands. Maybe. Caleb, I dunno. But Beau's right to be pissed, I think.
...
Is it really better? I don't know what to do about the future yet, and my past -- there's plenty from my past that I want to get back to... like, before Risu died. [ 'What do they call those, the good old days? Nah, sounds lame...' ]
[Like? No fucking fourteen-fifteen year olds should have had to do the shit they did? Hello? At all? But it's fine. IT'S FINE.]
Beauregard is... really protective of the people she cares about. They're important to her, so she'll... be upset.
[...]
You don't have to worry about the future right now, but that doesn't mean you can't face forward. I get it. I spent a long time thinking about... how things use to be. I spent so much time wanting to get off our island, and now I'm wishing things were as simple as they had been when we spent all day doing nothing on it.
[ IT'S FINE.... TEENAGE SUFFERING IS THE BREAD AND BUTTER OF JRPG.... ]
Right, yeah. [ He sighs a little. 'It's too complicated...' ] So I guess... just for now, try to focus on -- I guess, getting out of here? Figuring out the answer to this story? That's the only clear thing right now.
Yeah. We could use your help. You all have your stuff to worry about there. The keys, I mean. Let's get through right now before we look any further ahead.
[It's not mad, just exasperated a little. This is how he feels with all of Fall Dorm usual. Which is funny.]
We're still going to worry about all of you. It's... not only me. There are a lot of people here who wouldn't accept getting out of here without the rest of you.
I'm not going to try changing their minds. But... I also can't.
[ All of Fall Dorm just keeps giving Riku a hard time and it's really funny, I hope y'all living Falls getting along!!! ]
I know, that's not what I meant. I'm just saying, is all... we really don't have it any worse than you guys. Better, even. Not as much scary worry about getting assimilated if the killing thing's to be believed...
[ ...Gah!! There's a soft bonk sound on the other end of the phone, like he just put his forehead against the wall. ] I'm just trying to give you one less thing to worry about, okay? Damn.
[The problem is they get along!!!!!!!!! TOO WELL! Like FAMILY! ALL OF THEM! And then they turn around and (GESTURES AT CYOAS ANGRILY)]
Yeah, but we don't know if... or how long... it'd take you to get back. If you could even get back. Just because you aren't dealing with anything there doesn't mean it isn't scary.
[ No, we suffer together. But also I'm laughing at you DO THE OTHER MODS JUST PICK THE FALLS ON CYOA TO BULLY YOU, IS IT JUST RIKU CRYING IN A CORNER WHILE RNG KEEPS PICKING FALLS. ]
Yeah? Well... who's the one who's been telling me to look forward, huh? That means optimism doesn't it. Or, what the hell's a suitably stupid and shallow reason -- got a baseball game to catch?
[ A little mockingly, but really only for himself. ]
[ RIKU YOUR SUFFERING. And yet it's still not as bad as Annie... ]
That's what I meant, nerd. Since you won't do one unless I'm there for it.
...
If, you know. I count. Though either way, I would've rather you just played and had fun anyway. Don't like it when people are sad, even less if it's 'cause of me.
[ There's so much to think about, so much to do, all for an uncertain future and someone else's story... but what choice do they have? They're not the type to just go and lie down and take it all. ]
But that means we can't fail, at the least. So, we'll be counting on you too.
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I do. It took me a long time... to realize that. It took me a long time to figure out how to not ruin that. I haven't even started yet. To... be the friend that they deserve, the one they've been to me all this time.
...I think Molly and Caleb just understand more than you think. I know I asked you once whether your past and who you were really mattered. It was before... Well, Roxas was like that, too. He couldn't figure out where he came from, who he was. We put him in a digital town to keep him until he could finally rejoin with Sora instead of trying to tell him. It... wasn't exactly the right thing to do. He was angry.
I can't blame him. So I don't think it's bad you wanted to know. Knowing... lets you look ahead, right? Instead of always having to look at the past.
no subject
I really appreciate the thought, I just... Well, I think Molly understands. Maybe. Caleb, I dunno. But Beau's right to be pissed, I think.
...
Is it really better? I don't know what to do about the future yet, and my past -- there's plenty from my past that I want to get back to... like, before Risu died. [ 'What do they call those, the good old days? Nah, sounds lame...' ]
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[Like? No fucking fourteen-fifteen year olds should have had to do the shit they did? Hello? At all? But it's fine. IT'S FINE.]
Beauregard is... really protective of the people she cares about. They're important to her, so she'll... be upset.
[...]
You don't have to worry about the future right now, but that doesn't mean you can't face forward. I get it. I spent a long time thinking about... how things use to be. I spent so much time wanting to get off our island, and now I'm wishing things were as simple as they had been when we spent all day doing nothing on it.
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Right, yeah. [ He sighs a little. 'It's too complicated...' ] So I guess... just for now, try to focus on -- I guess, getting out of here? Figuring out the answer to this story? That's the only clear thing right now.
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Yeah. We could use your help. You all have your stuff to worry about there. The keys, I mean. Let's get through right now before we look any further ahead.
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Either way, not much to worry about in the Daycare. Living have it way more rough, probably. Don't even worry about us.
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[It's not mad, just exasperated a little. This is how he feels with all of Fall Dorm usual. Which is funny.]
We're still going to worry about all of you. It's... not only me. There are a lot of people here who wouldn't accept getting out of here without the rest of you.
I'm not going to try changing their minds. But... I also can't.
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I know, that's not what I meant. I'm just saying, is all... we really don't have it any worse than you guys. Better, even. Not as much scary worry about getting assimilated if the killing thing's to be believed...
[ ...Gah!! There's a soft bonk sound on the other end of the phone, like he just put his forehead against the wall. ] I'm just trying to give you one less thing to worry about, okay? Damn.
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Yeah, but we don't know if... or how long... it'd take you to get back. If you could even get back. Just because you aren't dealing with anything there doesn't mean it isn't scary.
[For... them... really. Let him live.]
...I know. But I worry anyway.
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Yeah? Well... who's the one who's been telling me to look forward, huh? That means optimism doesn't it. Or, what the hell's a suitably stupid and shallow reason -- got a baseball game to catch?
[ A little mockingly, but really only for himself. ]
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...tch. [The noise is half-hearted. Look, he can say that, but doesn't have to follow his own advice.] No, we're not using that one.
[THE BASEBALL GAME.]
Everyone tried to get me to play a game for you, but... it didn't feel right.
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That's what I meant, nerd. Since you won't do one unless I'm there for it.
...
If, you know. I count. Though either way, I would've rather you just played and had fun anyway. Don't like it when people are sad, even less if it's 'cause of me.
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Not a chance. You wanted a game. You think I'm not going to rub your nose in a lose?
[They were supposed to be on the same team!!!!!! lmao idiot]
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[ STOP NO BULLY. ]
But fine. Suppose I'll pick up where Caiman left off and play a game when the dust settles. That sound good?
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Yeah, that sounds good. Maybe we can play one right before everyone goes home, depending on how this all ends.
[There is no room here from him that they aren't gonna stop this.]
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[ There's so much to think about, so much to do, all for an uncertain future and someone else's story... but what choice do they have? They're not the type to just go and lie down and take it all. ]
But that means we can't fail, at the least. So, we'll be counting on you too.